Awesome Careers If You Don't Know What To Do With Your Life


Published on December 07, 2016

As our society becomes more complex, it can sometimes seem harder and harder to figure out what to do with the rest of your worthless life. But fret not! If you don't what to do with your time, give some consideration to these careers and maybe, just maybe, you will be able to suffer through the rest of your days.

Professional Mourner

Since you're reading this, you're probably already pretty miserable, so why not make misery your business? As a professional mourner, all you need to do is show up at funerals and be sad. And maybe the fact that someone was so lonely that they had to hire people to come to their funeral can put your life into perspective.

Professional Bridesmaid

Similar to a mourner but with a slightly more jovial tone. As a professional bridesmaid you get paid to go to weddings and stand next to someone who doesn't have any actual friends. Once again this career should make you feel better about your own miserable life, and hopefully you get a bunch of free food and booze.

Line Stander

Some people just can't wait for the newest things, but they don't have the time to wait in line outside of the electronics stores for days at a time. That's where you come in. As a line stander, you can do what you already do (which is nothing) as you hold a place in line to buy stuff for someone far wealthier than you.

Sex Toy Tester

Since you don't know what to do with your life, you probably spend a good amount of time anxiously masturbating. So put that practice to good use and test out some sex toys! You don't need many skills for this job, however being open minded (and open in other ways) will likely help you succeed.

Bed Tester

When you think about it, this one makes a lot of sense. Someone has to make sure those beds are nice and comfy. And since you spend so much time laying in bed already, I'm sure you know what makes a comfortable sleeping spot. So be productive and test some beds.

Human Statue

Maybe you're not into laying in bed all day? No problem!

Become a human statue and you can do nothing while standing up. As a human statue all you have to do is stand perfectly still... doing nothing... for hours. Sounds like a great job for someone who already does absolutely nothing.


And last but not least, pretend you have magical powers and bullshit people into doing things based on random, spiritual sounding rants that have no basis in reality. If you have a slightly theatrical streak, and you're good at lying, you could probably slide right into to a successful career as a psychic.

So there you go. A few careers that don't involve much in terms of skill or aspiration. If you don't know what to do with your life, give one of these jobs a try and see how it goes!

Have some other careers for people who don't know what to do with their lives?

Leave it in the comments.

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